A picture speaks a thousand words - just not always the right ones!

Today I'm devoting a portion of this blog to the glory of the photograph - and my new effort in avoiding them!  When you're someplace like this, where everyone is away from home, the photograph is not necessarily your friend.  Of course your own photos may bring you a level of comfort, make you smile or even laugh out loud - what I'm talking about today - in particular - are other people's photos and why I should just shut my mouth and NEVER comment on them.  I rarely offer to show anyone my personal photos because like babies, there is really only beauty in the eyes of the beholder and the rest of us are left slack jawed, racking our brains for something appropriate to say.  I tend to share the weird and unusual photos I find on the internet - pics of freakish anomalies, people of Walmart, cats, unorthodox plastic surgery, drag queens ... you get the "picture" (tee hee)...  (friends at work) "Hey!  Wanna see a pic of my family?",  (Me) - "Sure! Wanna see a pic of this guys 12 pound colon?"  Basically, I like to ask to see a photo if I'm really interested, but will politely accept a viewing offer otherwise.  So, here's a quick recap of some of my picture commentary in just one week;

"How cool - you're going to return home a Daddy" (She wasn't pregnant)
"Your grandma has a great smile" (was his wife)
"That little guy musta hurt coming out" (baby had oddly large noggin)
"He's a real cutie" (was his bald, toddler age granddaughter - was wearing green)
... had just made a joke about a trailer park and then saw pictures the next day of relatives in front of their trailer.

Luckily I managed not to comment on the obvious things like inauspicious birthmarks, heart conditions (noted by blueish lips), deformities or just sheer and horrific unfortunateness - in those situations I look for something else in the pic to comment on - even if it's waaaay in the back and off to the side - "I love that table cloth" or "what kind of grill is that?" and "who's the Hummel/commemorative plate/Nascar collector?"  The thing is, I really like the guys I work with and I think it's an honor to be asked to look at their personal pictures - I just wish I would think before I spoke - which has been a life-long curse.  I'm going to have to come up with some pics that I can carry around to prove that there ARE people actually related to me and those who will admit to being my friends - the dating/relationship aspect is totally not for sharing here - as a female, greatly in the minorit, I prefer to not even hint to the fact that I have any type of personal life.  I'm much more comfortable if people think I hang out at home, drink too much wine and make themed, felt outfits for my cats... "OK Louie, today you're going to be a cobbler - no! A flight attendant!"

This week has been a long one so far and I think all will work out in the end when I finally make it to my new home base.  I'm a little tired but much more calm.  I am disappointed, though, to hear that a new crop of toothless, inbred, drug-addled tenants moved into the building behind our condo back at home and now take their calls leaning against the walls of our building while cracked out prostitutes score drugs in their backyard ...  I may have to talk Betsy through  how to make urine balloons so she can lob them from the deck - but just thinking of her even considering doing it makes me laugh hard enough to calm myself down - me, not such a stretch, nor several  pee-ple I know ( you so know who you are...) So, let's toast the trusty old urine balloon as a strategy for fighting crime and undesirable neighbors!

Drink of the night:   Whatever I can get my hands on - I have balloons to fill - this is War!